Rules of communication with people

Every person is constantly in contact with others. In order for communication between people to be mutually polite and courteous, you should follow certain rules that will help avoid interpersonal conflict, and their tacit compliance will leave a pleasant impression after the conversation.

In each new group or company, it is necessary to apply its own specific rules; an individual approach to a person is often necessary. Communicating at home with family is very different from the way a person speaks at work or in a friendly company.

Speech ethics - a set of rules for decent speech behavior, based on moral, historical and cultural traditions. The main principle of speech etiquette is parity - equality of all parties in communication.

The concept of speech etiquette includes the sum of all norms of communication. These rules no one made in a single collection, however, they should be followed by any educated and educated person.

The essence of the difference between ethics and etiquette is that ethics is formed in the field of thinking that is not available for external observation. Etiquette is manifested only in the external environment. Etiquette reflects the psychological and social side of the personality, while ethics - moral and motivational.

Ethics and etiquette are visible in actions and communication. However, ethics will be manifested in self-assessment and evaluation criteria, processes and results will not always be open to people. Etiquette is available for observation. Sometimes a person follows the rules of etiquette automatically, without thinking about his action, less often it is done intentionally and “to the public”.

Ethical norms and principles laid down in a person form the basis of the morality of each person. Often they are presented as conscience. These standards and human qualities are not obvious. Each assessment of other people's actions is subjective. The nature of the assessment depends on the characteristics of each individual.

Ethical norms are enclosed in special speech formulas, which in different situations can reveal the true intentions of a person. A greeting always sets the tone for conversation. Taking into account the social status of each interlocutor, one of two options of addressing each other is chosen: YOU communication or YOU communication.

To establish contact and maintain a conversation, you should constantly contact a person by name, patronymic or taking into account his official position, depending on the rank and the relationship between you.

It is worth paying attention to cultural and historical traditions when greeting and interacting with strangers. Previously, a person could be addressed as follows: a citizen, a citizen, a man, a woman. In the present social conditions, a universal greeting is being developed for both men and women.

When referring to close people or children, words with diminutive suffixes or funny paraphrases can be used instead of reference as such. Often it is used in emotional conversation.

In every language and culture there is a set of etiquette formulas. They help to express your intentions. For example, when asking for forgiveness, words like “forgive (those)” and “sorry (those)” are used.

The request is best to use indirect statements that will reduce in the eyes of the interlocutor personal interest in action and give the right to choose. Examples of such constructions are the phrases: “Could you please ... / Would you tell me ...?”

Formulas of congratulations are much easier. They look like this: appeal, reason, then wishes.

Some speech etiquette models can be associated not only with the canons, but also with the rules of modern life or with the foundations of a certain group of persons. In this case, these forms can be considered as rituals of a separate group.

Reluctance to offend, hurt a person's feelings, cause discomfort leads to the use of euphemisms. Euphemism is a neutral phrase that does not carry the emotional load. Mild communication techniques are hints and hints. In the traditions of Russian speech etiquette, it is not customary to talk about people in the third person present by a number. This technique allows everyone to be in the general information space and to be involved in a conversational situation.

Polite behavior means that you will listen to the interlocutor's speech from beginning to end. It shows your respect for him. Interrupted more often by men - this is the conclusion of scientists, psychologists, women are more correct in addressing the interlocutor. Interrupting is a sign of loss of interest in conducting a conversation.

Communication can be divided into two types:

• verbal;
• non-verbal.

Verbal communication is carried out with the help of words, it can be divided into written and oral. In any form of verbal communication language is used. Language is understood as a system of signs and ways of combining them in one word, followed by a sentence or thought. Any language is heterogeneous, it can be divided into literary and non-literary. The literary form of the language is a model with well-established rules and regulations.

The basis of verbal communication are speech situations. They can be divided into:

• speaking is the use of a language to transmit information;
• hearing - perception of information in plain language;
• letter - transfer speech to a written form;
• reading - reproduction of text in a familiar language from paper.

Non-verbal communication is more difficult for perception, but, having learned its basics, you can better understand the interlocutor, to see his true attitude and feelings. If we consider the means of non-verbal communication, then it can be attributed to any external manifestations of emotions during a conversation.

Gestures - movements with hands and head. This method of transferring information between people is recognized as the oldest of all. In modern realities, they are trying to create a generally accepted vocabulary of gestures, but in each country gestures have a different historical meaning. Therefore, when communicating, it is best to know in advance about the meaning of your favorite gestures.

Facial expression - the movement of the muscles of the face. The main information for the interlocutor when communicating are the lips and eyebrows. Separately, it is worth considering eye contact as part of facial expressions. Visual contacts also have a certain meaning:

• Business look - in this case, you look ahead to the partner, it helps to create a more serious atmosphere.
• The social look is directed to the triangle between the eyes and the mouth. This helps defuse the atmosphere and make it more friendly.
• The intimate look is most often directed at the neck or chest. If such a view is mutual, it indicates a high interest in each other.
• A squint is most often seen as a sign of hostility or neglect.

Pantomime is the movement of the whole body. This may include posture, posture and gait.

Among the huge number of rules that govern communication between people, it is necessary to highlight several of the most important, moreover, universal. The first thing that needs to be done is to establish eye contact with the interlocutor.

Trying to make eye contact, do not be too zealous. Try not to be too close to the other person. Most will think that you violate his personal space, this often leads to discord in the conversation. The optimal distance is one meter.

Need to know that it is more appropriate to call a person by name. When in the correct form you call your interlocutor by name, you will be an extremely polite person in his eyes, it will be more difficult to refuse your requests. But the frequent mention of the name, especially in one form, is annoying. It is worth finding out how to contact the other person best of all, in order not to cause discomfort in him.

Constantly monitor the mood of the partner - this has a strong influence on the conduct of the conversation. In a good or medium mood, it is best to smile once more, and in a bad mood, to unobtrusively find out the reasons. Every person is pleased to know that someone is interested in his problems. But at the same time you should not try to “read” the thoughts - this can turn the interlocutor away from you. It is best to wait for the moment when they tell you about life problems and troubles.

When communicating, you must constantly hear the interlocutor. Anyone can begin to give any advice without hearing the interlocutor's opinion on the matter. Such a position may cast doubt on the sincerity of your words and advice.

Every day we start conversations with different people. In addition to the mandatory rules, there are situational rules that need to be applied only when communicating with a certain circle of people.

When communicating with friends or in everyday life, many believe that there is no framework. Frequent sharp jokes, the use of "nicknames" with other people, a conversation on an elevated tone - this does not strengthen friendly ties, but rather the opposite.

When communicating with children, it is necessary to remember that children will not do what you tell them. Children, most likely, will project your behavior on others or on you, will communicate with the elderly and adults as well as you. You can not put pressure on children only by your own physical strength, because later children, older and younger, will apply this technique to you. You must always find a common language with them and go out of any situation so that everyone is happy. Special attention should be paid to the communication of the child with peers.

When communicating in a business environment, you need to remember that "brevity is the soul of wit". You should always express your thoughts briefly, but capaciously, without water and superfluous information. It is necessary to constantly listen to colleagues, to take into account their opinions when solving various issues. It is necessary to keep at a high level a culture of not only speech, but also writing.

In social networks you can see many aspects of the personal and even intimate life of many users. Etiquette recommends not doing this. You should not show off your whole life. In social networks, it is not worth answering the "trolls" to their inappropriate, often offensive messages and comments. Etiquette does not encourage frequent use of abbreviations in messages.

When talking on the phone, you should always be polite. Even if a stranger called you, try to find out the purpose of his call. It must be remembered that answering the best to the call quickly - the efficiency will appeal to any person. There are a number of rules for phone calls:

1. It is not recommended to call before 9 am and after 9 pm
2. The conversation should begin with a greeting phrase.
3. Always introduce yourself by name, especially if you call a stranger or an unfamiliar person.
4. It is necessary to find out whether your interlocutor is comfortable to have a conversation.
5. Phone conversations should not last too long.
6. Conversation is necessary in a friendly tone.
7. Thoughts must be expressed briefly.
8. End the conversation is necessary only after you make sure that your caller said and learned everything you need.

When dealing with people with disabilities, it is necessary to show tolerance and patience. You should communicate with them on equal terms, despite their illness. Their sphere of communication should be as big as everyone, because now the process of inclusion is in full swing.

The culture of communication is always laid in childhood by parents, friends, school environment. Often those communication patterns that were used in childhood may be ineffective when communicating in adulthood. In order for communication to be effective, you must follow some rules:

• It is necessary to establish contact with the interlocutor. Without it, communication can completely lose its meaning.
• It is necessary to adhere to the same tempo in speech.
• It is desirable to take a similar body position.
• You should not talk a lot and flowery. It is best to have speech specifics.
• Constantly pay attention to non-verbal communication tools.
• At the end of a conversation, it is best to draw a certain conclusion whether the interlocutors correctly understood each other’s thoughts and words.

In the modern world, it is necessary to know the rules of conducting a conflict-free dialogue with people in different situations, to be able to establish contact with people of any social status. Every self-respecting person should learn a culture of effective communication. Perhaps writing a personal memo with all the rules of communication with people.

See how to learn how to communicate with people in the next video.